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A new year and a new “improved” calendar

12 Jan

Gentleman bearJust like last year, I chose a $1 calendar to revamp for my brother’s Christmas present. This is a great personalized gift for anyone who shares your sense of humor.

All you need is a calendar, a few Sharpies, and enough free time to do justice to your concepts. As you’ll see, talent for drawing is truly optional.

For 2012, I chose a “Baby Animals” calendar, which will be hard to top in the future for sickly sappiness and satirical potential. I don’t know the precise target market for “Baby Animals,” but it’s somewhere between childless spinsters and tasteless grandmoms.

I still paid only $1, and yet this year’s calendar was thick enough that my Sharpie marks did not bleed through to the other side, saving me the trouble of resurfacing the monthly pages like last year. Perhaps the Dollar Tree’s $1 calendars are superior to Target’s $1 calendars. Should I do a side-by-side test next year?

Polar-bears-slainRaccoon Rampage

If your calendar does bleed through, double down on your $1 investment and paste over your calendar pages with the duplicates from the new, untouched copy.

Porcupine-clownSwans-Harold-and-Maude

Highly recommended: industrial and metallic Sharpies. As noted in my review of premium permanent markers, the Industrial Sharpie makes incomparably dark lines, while the silver metallic Sharpie shows up like bright paint on dark surfaces (see the Gentleman Bear’s monocle and the porcupine clown’s collar).

Penguins-fart-too

New Year’s Resolution: Use a scanner next year to avoid flash glare! Photographing glossy prints is a bitch.

 
 

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